Super Bowl Sunday is a staple of North American sports culture. It represents copious amounts of beer. It represents long stretches of marginal football. And most importantly, it represents the greatest gambling day of the entire year. With nearly 400 prop bets available for wager, trying to decipher which way to lose your money can be quite tricky. Lucky for you, Briefed’s tabbed their degenerate gambler to help guide you through the best ways to become a multi millionaire on Superbowl Sunday.
ODDS TO WIN SUPER BOWL MVP
Ray Lewis – 7/1
Whichever way you want to shake it, this game is all about Ray Lewis. Ever since he announced his intention to retire at end of this playoff run, the media, NFL, and football fans around the world have turned the last month into a Ray Lewis love fest. If the Ravens were to win this game, it would be borderline criminal if Ray Lewis doesn’t win the MVP award. At 7/1, you could do a lot worse.
Plus, wouldn’t you feel better at night knowing you have money on this guy.
WHAT WILL BE HIGHER – LEBRON JAMES TOTAL POINTS (vs. Toronto) OR SAN FRANCISCO 49ERS TOTAL TEAM POINTS
Lebron James total points – (-115)
If you’re going to wager on prop bets during the Super Bowl, you have to gamble on at least one cross-sport prop. This one is interesting and may depend on whether or not you think the 49ers can win this game. However, here’s what we do know: The Toronto Raptors suck and LeBron James is the best basketball player on the planet. If King James can get to 30 points (he’s averaged over 30 a game over his last 5), you should be in the money. The 49ers have only gone over 30 twice since the start of December, and as we mentioned earlier, Ray Lewis and his dance moves will be in charge of keeping the 49ers offense in check.
HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE ALICIA KEYS TO SING THE NATIONAL ANTHEM
Under – 2 minutes and 10 seconds (-135)
This is always one of my favourite prop bets and pretty much validates the fact you have a serious gambling problem. Every year, this prop bet comes down to how long the singer holds the word “brave” at the end of the anthem. However, there is zero reason for this anthem, which can easily be sung in about a minute and a half, should take this long. Last year, Christina Aguilera clocked in at under 2:15, and considering that she never met a note that she didn’t feel the need to over sing, I feel like history says we need to take the under.
The one wildcard? Keys, in a recent interview with MTV, hinted that she would be doing the anthem “my style and my way”. Who knows what that means, and this prop has already been way overanalyzed. So take the under and hope her mic cuts out at the 2 minute mark.
WILL BEYONCE BE JOINED ON STAGE BY JAY-Z DURING THE SUPER BOWL HALFTIME SHOW
Don’t you just want this to happen? I’m willing to wager a few bucks on the sheer hope that Jay-Z can salvage this performance.
WILL BEYONCE’S HAIR BE CURLY/CRIMPED OR STRAIGHT AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SUPER BOWL HALFTIME SHOW
In order to get insight on this prop bet, I surveyed several women to get their take. The general consensus? Big waves. While I (and probably 99% of men watching this game) will be focused everything but her hair, this seems like too big of a stage for Beyonce to go conservative.
HOW MANY TIMES WILL “HARBAUGH” BE SAID DURING THE GAME?
Over: 20.5 (-145)
If you haven’t heard, the two coaches in this game are brothers. And yes, they both have the last name Harbaugh. I have a feeling this goes WAY OVER 20. Every time there’s a major decision, a challenge, they show their parents, or even mention the fact that they’re brothers, that’s sure to account for multiple “Harbaugh” references. Keep in mind this game will take close to 4 hours, so there’s plenty of time to get to 21.
WHAT COLOUR WILL THE GATORADE (OR LIQUID) BE THAT IS DUMPED ON THE HEAD COACH OF THE WINNING SUPER BOWL TEAM
This bet is the definition of crapshoot. But at 13/2, how can you not like red. “Clear/water” won’t pay enough to make it worth it. Nobody in his or her right mind drinks yellow Gatorade, so that’s out. I had no idea green Gatorade existed, so that’s out too. So we’ve now narrowed it down to orange, blue, and red. Red has the most carbs and calories, and we’ll make that the arbitral-determining factor in this case. Go red and be very afraid that you’re about to lose a boatload of money.
WHO WILL THE SUPER BOWL MVP THANK FIRST
If you think Ray Lewis is going to win this award, this is free money. If you think Colin Kapernick wins this award, this is also free money (he has bible verses tattooed on this arms). And plus, there’s always a chance the MVP is so overcome with emotion, that the first thing he says is “Oh My God!” which would certainly count as a win in this case.
There you have it. We covered our favourite eight prop bets for this year’s big game. With these wagers on your bet slip, you’ll have money riding on the pre game, in game, halftime show, and post game. Best of luck to you on this holy day of gambling, and remember, any money you make – Briefed gets a cut!
Story by Jamil Karim